Hi! Surprise! We’re pregnant!

But, seriously, no surprise at all, because chances are that if you’re reading this, you’ve seen our little Disney baby announcement that I just had to go through with (I know, I know) and finally got after a million failed photo attempts. Oh, and my ten other baby related social media posts after that. Sorry. Kind of. I’m that person right now.

My last blog post was about the difficulty that is known as “getting pregnant,” and all the feels and cultural taboos surrounding that. That was about 6 months ago. I’m about 27 weeks pregnant….or almost 6 months along. Sooo yea, do the math my friends. Funny how those things work, right?

Ok – let’s see. Things you may be wondering… Did we end up getting any specific medications or treatment to help? Did I have any idea I was maybe pregnant when I wrote that post? How are things going so far?

Let’s recap.

So, we ended up not having to use any meds or do any specific treatments. Everything ended up happening the old-fashioned way. But realistically, we were just a few weeks/months away from figuring out our next steps with the doc. I’m so thankful for those who reached out to us, prayed for us, and encouraged us along the way. Ya’ll are my people. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I know that the journey could have been a lot longer and harder.

No, I had no clue that I was pregnant when I wrote my last post. If you recall, I barely understood how all the magic timing worked in the beginning. Science and Jesus just took over and BAM, here I am with a basketball belly at month six.  I felt a weird peace about the process, and during the times when I was feeling anxious, I’d lean heavily on the fact that no amount of worrying was going to change God’s plan. He already had it figured out. We just had to do our part and trust. Bless up.

And, how are things going? Man, this is a loaded question….how much time do we have?

First, great. I’m feeling very, very good, I’m way past the first trimester hump of feeling hung over + having the flu every single day. So…pretty much awesome. I never really had the pleasure of experiencing “morning sickness”…because it was all-day sickness. Hormones were crazy those first 12 weeks and I felt like a mad person. Cheery conversations were hard, I felt anti-social/introverted, and my tolerance for crap was at an all time low. (And my tolerance is typically pretty high, guys. I usually love all people and all the things. Life is always cheery and cool and chill.)

After one particularly “challenging” day (PG version), Jon looked at me pleadingly/desperately and asked “Are you going to be like this forever?”

PRO TIP: DON’T EVER ASK A PREGNANT WOMAN IN HER FIRST TRIMESTER THAT QUESTION.

Now, as you can imagine, I very politely reminded him that I was carrying his child, and that there was a human thing growing inside of me and my body was changing every two seconds, and that he should probably rethink his statement ASAP and also probably leave me alone for the next 6 months. Bless his heart.

You could say the rest of that evening was quite pleasant.

(For the record, he’s been an absolute saint this whole time trying to navigate this new world. Props, JG.)

Many of my gal friends and family have been pregnant, and I feel like I never saw this side of them in the first twelve weeks. It’s a weird place to be in, and you feel like you basically have to fake it until you make it, because no one wants to be around the pregnant angry/hungry person. But it’s this weird transition of…”Ah, I’m pregnant this is so cool, I’m so pumped!!” to “What is happening to me?!”…to secretly thinking in the back of your mind”Oh my gosh, but for real, WILL I ACTUALLY BE LIKE THIS FOREVER!?”

I’m happy to report that around week 14 we totally cleared that hurdle. Second trimester is basically a dream compared to the first. Biggest challenges now include: all the cereal cravings, finding cute/normal maternity pants, wearing said pants backwards on accident so the belly band was over my buns and I couldn’t figure out why everything was sagging in the back all day, and sleeping comfortably. But I’ve been winning because there are a million cereal choices, I haven’t worn my pants backwards again since “the incident,” and pregnancy pillows are freaking amazing once you figure out how to maneuver them to fit your body. Here’s the one I ended up with (and yes I know it looks all kinds of crazy/huge/weird, but guys, it’s gold.)

Also, I need to know, women who have been pregnant before, was the struggle constantly real as your body changed? As a person whose been decently fit most of their life and has put a lot of effort into trying to eat right and exercise, watching something you’ve worked hard for disappear is a bit tough. Not only that, but being the competitive person I am…watching your friends and fellow athletes whiz past you in development and strength is tough… as your athletic progress basically digresses.

I hate that I’m even saying this or thinking this way. We hoped and prayed for this kid for a long time. Pregnancy is beautiful and it’s one of life’s greatest miracles and I’m so ecstatic to start this chapter of my life and welcome this guy into the world. But I’d be lying if I said it’s not also awkward and hard to watch your body change when you’re so used to it being a certain way and being able to control (for the most part) how and when your body changes. I refuse to step on a scale…except when I have to at the doctor. And the day I saw that number creep to a number I never thought I’d see in my life…that was a toughy. You hear women say all the time “you’re body will never be the same after kids!”..and that kind of makes me nervous because I love being active and pushing my body to the limit in things like CrossFit. Will I ever be able to do those things the same way again? I’m probably being dramatic. But, #realthoughts. Does that make me bad or selfish or insecure? I don’t know, I’m not sure. But as my pastor in Alabama would say when he was trying to make a point and make sure his church people were hearing him….”Come on, somebody!” Am I alone here?

So moving on, yes,  I’m still CrossFitting. Much to the confusion of some folks, I think. (Sorry fam!) I think it makes them nervous because they imagine (as I would, if I wasn’t 100% in the know with what CrossFit was) that I’m jostling Baby G around every time I step into the gym. I’m happy to report that CrossFit616 coaches are extremely well-versed when it comes to pregnancy and crossfitting; working with several docs to make sure the programming is appropriate for each stage momma-to-be’s are in. They’re tuned into how my individual pregnancy is going and are constantly checking in to see how/if things have changed week to week. They’ve had lots of pregnancies in their gym and each babe was born as healthy as can be. I can 100% say with confidence that getting out and exercising and moving has been one of the best things I’ve done for myself during my pregnancy. (Plus, I gotta work off some of those bowls of Lucky Charms.)

And lastly, guys, do personal goals change after baby? You can’t possibly be the same person or the same couple with the same priorities. And not that that’s a bad thing. I’m so, so excited to bring this little ham into the world and for us to love on him with everything we have. But do we care about the same things we once did? I realize that you absolutely need to prioritize some of the same things you did pre-baby (health, your relationship as a couple, friends, etc.), but what about the other personal things you always try to work towards?

I purchased one of those Self Journals from BestSelf about two months ago. You guys know I geek out over all that goal-setting stuff. I love it, give me all the self-development books and journals. In a nutshell, it’s basically a thirteen week goal-setting journal. People swear by it, and I’ve heard such great things about it… so naturally I had to have my own copy. And then it sat on my desk for months. Just this past week I decided to pick it up again and counted 13 weeks out from Sunday and realized that that pretty much brings us right up to baby time. A weird, anxious feeling came over me like…”Ah, I only have 3 months to accomplish these things before my life changes forever and I’ll never be able to focus on personal goals again!”

Again, dramatic? Maybe…but I’ve never done this baby thing before… so I don’t know!

I know I’ve just basically been conveying my fears and questions for the past five minutes here…and part of me feels like I should hit “delete” and start over with this blog…because shouldn’t this be all about the happy feels? I certainly do NOT want to confuse anyone… we are beyond thrilled, and the joy, thankfulness and excitement we feel for Baby G cannot be contained. Oh my goodness… feeling him get bigger and kicking and doing all out Billy Blanks style Tae Bo in my belly is hilarious and awesome. I chuckle to myself when I listen to my rotation of favorite Pandora stations and realize that this kid is going to be coming out of the womb singing Hillsong, Jason Mraz, Missy Elliott and Drake. Warms my heart. Registering for all the tiny baby things and concepting the design for his nursery have been an absolute blast.

But I’d be lying if I pretended like there wasn’t another side to it all too. I was talking to a dear friend of mine who is only about 6 weeks behind me in her pregnancy. We were exchanging stories about craving unlimited caramel apple suckers and jamocha shakes and how our thighs and buns were not having it. She came out and said “Anyone who says they loved being pregnant have either forgotten half of it or were lying.” Um, YES. But then she followed up with “But, I’m so in love with this little boy, it will be all worth it!! But it doesn’t mean I have to love everything about the process.” Preach sister. I feel you times ten.

So there you have it. The longest pregs update ever. But I know the best is yet to come. And Jon and I couldn’t be more excited. In the meantime, for the next 3 months you can find me attempting pregnant burpees at the gym, wrapped up like a giant burrito with my pregnancy pillow (huge sorry to the hubs, I know it’s sooo not sexy) and trying my hardest to not have anymore embarrassing wardrobe malfunctions with my preggo pants.

Pockets go in the back, ladies. Belly band is always in front.